6 Ways to Use Your Phone to Connect with Your Teen

Graphic of a cell phone with a text bubble. The text bubble contains a heart.

While smartphones are often seen as a barrier to family connection, phones can actually add to the bond between parents and children when they are used intentionally. Here are a few ways you can use your cell phone as a tool to strengthen your relationship with your teen.

Graphic of a hand holding a phone displaying a cat picture.

Share media

Sending memes, gifs, short videos or articles that align with your child’s interests or sense of humor can let your child know you are thinking of them, spark conversations and create shared interests. Encourage your child to share their favorite media with you as well.

Graphic of a boy wearing headphones looking at his phone

Video call

When you’re traveling for work or when your child is staying with a friend or relative, video calls can help bridge the distance. Make it a habit to connect via video chat on days you won’t see each other in person to help maintain a sense of closeness. Video calls are also a great way to stay in contact with grandparents and family members who live in a different city or state.

Graphic of a phone with a speech bubble. The speech bubble contains a video game controller

Play games together

Many mobile games have multiplayer experiences. Look for age-appropriate games that you and your child can play together whether you’re in the same room or miles apart.

Graphic of a landline phone with three hearts next to it

Express gratitude

Use your phone to recognize your child for the small, positive things they do throughout the day. Send a text to let them know you’re proud of them, congratulate them on a good grade or accomplishment or thank them for completing a chore or helping out at home.

Graphic of two phones facing each other with texting bubbles on the screens mirrored

Ask questions

Some children and teens who are nervous about opening up in person will be more likely to share their feelings through text messages. This is especially true when they are upset about something that happened during the day. If your child isn’t ready to talk about an issue out loud, try asking open-ended questions by text message to see if they’ll be more comfortable confiding in you.

Graphic of 3 people smiling and the middle person is holding a selfie stick

Take pictures

Use your cell phone to capture special moments with your child, such as family outings or milestone achievements. Create digital photo albums or videos that you can revisit together. You can also text a photo or memory to your child with a note about how much you enjoyed participating in a certain activity with them.

The author of this article, Nikki Kontz, LMSW, is the clinical director of Teen Lifeline, a Phoenix-based, nonprofit dedicated to preventing teen suicide in Arizona. Contact her at nikki@teenlifeline.org or 602-248-8337.